Missing Her More Today

It going on 3+ years and I miss her as much today as the day she passed. I swear the pain is just as strong as the day she passed. I know there are a lot of people who are sharing the same pain as me, especially since today is the 25th anniversary of 9/11.

Many of those people did not get the luxury that I had to be with my loved one the moment she passed. While those final moments are ones that haunt me, and ones I have flash backs of, at least I was with her and I am thankful for that. I dont know if those that don’t get those moments are blessed or cursed. At least I was able to hug and kiss her when it was over and wish her Godspeed to heaven. So many, especially those on 9/11 did not get that opportunity. So many did not get to see any part of their loved ones.

I have told Jennifer and my 9/11 story. So I won’t bore those reading with it again. This morning I was reflecting back on that day. One thing that is always part of that memory was how eerie it was picking Jennifer up at the Dallas airport. There were planes parked everywhere and it was so quiet. Really freaky.

I remember how sorry we were for the people in New York City and how thankful we were to be back together. On the ride back to Houston, we listened to the news as the country was trying to figure out what the hell had happened and what was going on. We talked about what we thought about what was going to happen going forward. Then when we got home and saw the carnage of that day on the television. It was and 25 years later still is unfathomable.

It is sad that we have the orange dipshit and his cronies in office on this historic anniversary. He is on the TV at the Pentagon trying to justify his Iranian War as he try’s to honor the victims of 9/11. Sadly I have had to mute the TV because I just can’t handle listening to his babble.

After 9/11 it was interesting to see the country come together. 25 years later and we are so divided that it is scary. What just blows my mind is that the clips of the RNC convention that I saw, (because believe me I did not watch one moment of it) was how many women were in the back ground wearing their Trump crap and waving their American flags. It just blows my mind how many women (young and old) support this piece of shit. I have and will continue to say I can’t believe three groups of people in particular can support him. They are Women, People of Color and Veterans.

It is amazing that one individual can brain wash so many people into believing he is helping them while he is screwing and robbing them blind. I should not be surprised, Hitler did the same damn thing. They say history repeats itself and unfortunately we are seeing that play out. I just never thought it would happen in this country.

All of this makes me miss Jennifer even more. I have no one to commiserate (like we could) with about all of this. Don’t get me wrong, I have friends that share many of the same thoughts/beliefs but it is just not the same as your spouse. At the same time, I am happy she is not here, because I would need to invest in Kleenex because we would be going through a shit load of it with all the crying and cussing she would be doing. I would not handle that very well.

Another thing that scares me is the rise of these so called Democratic Socialist candidates around the country. I feel that the far right and the far left are the same damn thing and neither are good for our country. Everything can not be free of charge, yes we need affordable medical care, better education, better services for our Veterans, but all of that comes at a cost. I do feel all of us, regardless of our wealth and status need to pay our fair share into all of these.

Well enough of me preaching from my soap box. Let’s all never forget those that passed on that fateful day 25 years ago.