Coming Up On A Year And Say A Prayer For My Dad

It is coming up on a year since we had Jennifer’s memorial service in Butte. It really is hard for me to believe that a year has already passed.

As I mentioned in my last post I have been missing her terribly. I think I am struggling with a form of survivors guilt. Why am I still here living the good life and she was taken? I guarantee she was a much better person than me and deserved to live more of the life that we worked for together and planned for. I guess I just have to accept it and move on, there is nothing else I can do that is going to change the fact that she is gone.

I would ask that everyone that reads my blog to please add my Dad to your prayer list. He is going through a tough patch and is actually in the hospital in Billings, MT. The story on why he is in Billings is a long one, but thats for another day. He went to hospital in Butte on Sunday because of a suspected urinary tract infection, (which he did have) but he was also having other symptoms that his liver was not functioning correctly (jaundice, liver enzymes out of wack, etc). Turns out he needed to have gallbladder surgery. Unfortunately that could not be done in Butte and it took a awhile (most of Sunday) to find a hospital they could ship him to for the surgery.

He was helicoptered to Billings late Sunday evening. Fortunately my sister Cindy was able to drive to Billings on Monday morning and was with him for the surgery. It was done laparoscopically. Yesterday he was improving, but was sore. He will likely be discharged from the hospital today, but will be going to a nursing home (provided they can find a spot for him) in Butte. However all the details on how this is going to happen are yet to be worked out. Needless to say, this has been tough on him, both physically and emotionally. The nursing home is the absolute last place he wants to go, but is where he needs to go.

I should be up there to help with all of this, but I have my own Doctor appointments that I need to be at. One is tomorrow and one is coming up at the end of October. I need to get my high blood pressure medicines refilled ( I will be running out of them in the next couple of weeks). Currently I don’t technically have a physician, my general practitioner is on a sabbatical going to school and my cardiologist left his practice to go back to Georgia. So I have to be here for these appointments with new doctors.

However, that does not lessen my guilt about not being there. Once again the majority of burden has fallen on Cindy and Chad. Colleen is helping as much as she can, but with her being new in her job does not have time to take off. So it is another shit show that Cindy and Chad are dealing with.

Anyway if you could add the old boy to your prayers it would be appreciated.

I am staying busy to try and keep my sanity as life moves on.

Enough for today.